Most mainstream movie critics often stick to the safe world of artsy and dramatic films. The result of this activity is usually a positive review for a film that most of us will never want to see. When these same critics settle down to watch an action or horror film, the movie going public is usually assaulted with a one star review and the words “stay away at all costs.” Luckily, the common moviegoer has a white knight in their corner. Well, maybe a dark knight now that I think about it. Fresh off the highly successful ‘Seagalology: A Study of the Ass-Kicking Films of Steven Seagal’, movie reviewer extraordinaire Vern has returned with ‘Yippee Ki-Yay Moviegoer! Writings on Bruce Willis, Badass Cinema, and Other Important Topics’.
The book contains an eclectic collection of Vern’s extremely funny and unique film reviews. The reviews contained within its 420 pages tend to be rants more than the critiques we’re used to hearing. Most of the films that are reviewed fall into the action, horror, and sci-fi genres. Not to be outdone by his more recognizable peers, reviews of some extremely dramatic films are thrown in for good measure as well. We are not talking about films like Citizen Kane here ladies and gentlemen. I never thought I would see someone seriously delve into the awesomeness that is Brain Bozworth’s ‘Stone Cold’ or my favorite Schwarzenegger film, ‘Commando’. That is what you are getting with this book. A bunch of kick-ass reviews of even more kick-ass films. Yeah there are those reviews of dramatic films that I mentioned, but they are relegated to a couple chapters and still remain very tongue-in-cheek. For example, Vern’s reviews of ‘Brokeback Mountain’ and ‘Zoo’ are something to behold. I literally was laughing uncontrollably at times while reading this book and that was before Vern goes into his thorough investigation into the career of movie badass Bruce Willis, the ‘Die Hard’ series, and why Willis is the greatest action star to date.
While I highly recommend the book, it may not be for everyone. Vern is prone to using a lot of profanity, but that really isn’t a surprise considering the films he is talking about. It is expected that reviews of these films should be just as over-the-top as the films themselves. I’m not sure if ? will ever see this review, but if you do Mike, I would avoid it at all costs. Vern is not a huge fan of your work, especially ‘Transformers’-, and he is definitely not afraid to say so. Whew! He does not like your work! That goes for you too Tony Scott!
Here’s a little tip for you up-and-coming film critics out there, take your lessons from Vern and I guarantee you will have success. You may not achieve “mainstream” success, but you will earn a hell of a lot more respect from the general public than most of the established critics ever will. ‘Yippe Ki-Yay Moviegoer! Writings on Bruce Willis, Badass Cinema, and Other Important Topics’ is a 4.5 out of 5. Run out and pick this one up as soon as you can. Here’s hoping Vern is around for a while and eventually returns with an in depth study of 80’s pain in the ass Billy Zabka or perhaps a study of the phenomenon that was the two Corey’s. I think either could make for one hell of a book. Until then… Yippee Ki-Yay Mr. Falcon! — Steve Johnson of Icon Vs. Icon